Noisy Feelings

by Ryan Lerman

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john preston carr
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john preston carr If I'd never discovered If I'd Never Seen Your Face my life would be significantly less rich (it may be a perfect song) Favorite track: If I'd Never Seen Your Face.
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credits

released November 22, 2019

all songs written, mixed and produced by ryan lerman*
mastered by patricia sullivan at bernie grundman mastering
cover photo by ricky chavez
cover design by sebastian white

*except Track 4, written by ryan lerman and larry goldings

learning how to swim
ryan lerman, piano, vocals
rob moose, violin, viola, octave viola, string arrangement

american dream
mike g, drums, percussion
ryan lerman, bass, wurlitzer, guitar, vocals
sam smith, background vocals
theo katzman, background vocals
hideaki aomori, clarinet, flute

the coffin nail
ryan lerman, guitars, drums, piano, vocals
daniel aged, bass
cj camerieri, trumpet, french horn

half of the way
aaron sterling, drums, percussion
pino palladino, bass
larry goldings, organ
ryan lerman, guitar, vocals
mike g, background vocals

the past the past
tamir barzilay, drums
ryan lerman, bass, piano, juno, guitar, string arrangement, vocals
garo yellin, cello

if id never seen your face
sarab singh, drums
whynot jansveld, bass
ryan lerman, piano, guitar, organ, vocals
joey dosik, alto saxophone, background vocals

hard to break up
theo katzman, drums
ryan lerman, bass, guitar, piano, organ, vocals
rob moose, violin, viola, octave viola, string arrangement

windy day
rob humphreys, drums
ryan lerman, wurlitzer, bass, guitar, percussion, vocals
ross garren, chromatic and other harmonicas
mike g, background vocals
theo katzman, background vocals

mexico
theo katzman, drums, percussion
joe dart, bass
ryan lerman, guitars, drums, organ, percussion, vocals
cj camerieri, trumpet

cross your heart
ryan lerman, baritone acoustic guitar, piano, acetone organ, juno, percussion, vocals
mason stoops, fretless baritone electric guitar

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Ryan Lerman Los Angeles, California

trying to write good songs.

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Track Name: Learning How To Swim
You know she's got this way about her
I don't think I can live without her now
I didn't always feel this way but now I don't know what to say
I tried to test the water and fell in
And now I guess I'm learning how to swim

You know there's something strange about her
All I did at first was doubt her, its true
I tried to keep her at arms length I tried and tried with all my strength
But the air has left this raft we're floating in
So now I guess I'm learning how to swim

Left stroke, right stroke - take it easy
Don't hold your heart too high
Don't be careful, don't be scared of what you might imply

You know we've got this chemistry
I'm not sure what came over me to prove
You'd think that I'd be sleeping better
She tried to leave I wouldn't let her
The future could be bright or mighty dim
Well, either way I'm learning how to swim
Yeah now I guess I'm learning how to swim
Track Name: American Dream
Uptight people trying to tell me how to live life
Nobody asked if I was alright
I'm not i'm dying to be someone can work to feed their family
And not at the mercy of frivolity of changing markets

So if you feel left out
If you're feeling overworked and underpaid
Nothing's working out?
Well don't look at me
You can thank the American dream

Move on down the line so I can use my coupon
A bucket of french fries and a big gun
I ain't taking chances

[chorus]

I got no reasons now to weigh me down
I know my rights and you can't have em
Now could someone help me off the couch?

[chorus]

Welcome to the American dream
America, fuck yeah
Track Name: The Coffin Nail
How about we play a game
I will dig a shallow grave
First one to forget their name has to lay in it

Guess you spun a clever tale
In which I play the coffin nail
I guess that I can’t help but fail
So I’ll just wait for it

Didn’t see you standing there
Fixing my electric chair
Crying how it isn’t fair
But you made the rules

The farmer don’t forget his plow
But you’ve forgotten me somehow
I sold it all and bet on you
Now I’ll pay for it

Cause I was the first to jump
You said you’d be right behind me
Where did you go
Where did you go
Track Name: Half Of The Way
Used to think I was fine on my own, yeah
Had a house but you made it a home
I'll be your light on your darkest day
Just don't love me half of the way

Used to carry the weight of it all, yeah
Before I had you there to break my fall
Pay no mind to what your friends may say
Just don't love me half of the way

We're half of the way
To being broken hearted
We're half of the way
Unless you let me in
We're half of the way
From being back to the start
So don't love me half of the way

I could see you were lonesome as me, yeah
You said you could use some company
I chip away but your walls don't break
You still love me half of the way

[chorus]

You can say that it's only a game
I don't mind playing the fool
But nobody wants to hold half of a hand
And nobody breaks half the rules

I'll be your light on your darkest day
Just don't love me half of the way

[chorus]
Track Name: The Past The Past
You've been looking for an answer
To a question no one asked
Well you can try to make believe
Or make the past the past

You've been walking on the ceiling
And you're worried it won't last
Well every thought that weighs you down
Won't make the past the past

I get so restless and so i sleep less
Stay up trying to scrub the writing off the wall
But every outcome just leaves my legs numb
And me ego small

You watch the fish inside the water
Stuck on a line that wasn't cast
He's too scared to sink or swim
Make the past the past

And so you visit a museum
And put your nose up to the glass
Marvel at walls that others scaled
Who made the past the past

I get so tired, so uninspired
Feeling bad about feeling bad
The time is fading, I'm getting jaded
And my reflection's getting sad

I hope you find what you've been looking for
Cause I don't know how to help you anymore

I caught you looking in the mirror
But there was no one looking back
All this time spent hollowed out
By everything you lack
I wish you'd just make the past the past
Track Name: If I'd Never Seen Your Face
If i'd never seen your face
We'd never have begun this chase
Wouldn't be inside this lonely place

If I'd never asked your name
We'd never have begun this game
Of pretending we don't feel the same
If I'd never seen your face

And if you'd never slept with my best friend
I wouldn't wanna see your face smashed in
I mighta given you a wedding ring

If i'd never held your hand
Mighta had a different plan
We're scared of things that we don't understand
if i'd never held your hand

And if you'd never shat upon my heart
I wouldn't wanna see you torn apart
I wouldn't think about the very start and cry

I wouldn't wish you'd never looked my way
Or wish I'd never found the words to say
Do you happen to have the time?
Track Name: Hard To Break Up
It's hard to break up - it can take a while
But it can make you smile if you wait long enough

It's tough to admit this is it for good
But you know you should if you were strong enough

It's hard to break up when the love is gone
And there's nothing on the horizon

Yeah it's tough to have faith in the great unknown
When your cover's blown and you're capsizing

But you must make your great escape to see that you could be happier
Though it may be tough to think that way when all you feel is crappier

It's hard to break up when you're comfortable
And your cup's not full but it's not empty

So you try to make sense of a losing game
But you can't take the blame - we're not 20 anymore

You must make your great escape to see that you could be happier
Though it may be tough to think that way when all you feel is crappier

It's hard to break up. It can take a while
But it can make you smile if you wait long enough
Track Name: Windy Day
It’s a windy day
The trees are swaying
I wanna cancel all of my plans and stay in
Put a record on
The house is strong
It'll be okay

Got my windows shut
But I still hear it
The sound of violins in the leaves so clear
It’s like my favorite sound
That I just found
On a windy day

Oh —
Well it makes you think about your life
Put your chin in your hands a sigh
Would I be feeling this way if I could honestly say
At the end of the day that a I tried

I let the dog outside
And he's so happy
Oh to be so easily pleased
Wouldn't that be the greatest thing?
I could, you say?
On a windy day

[chorus]

I put the kettle on
And kick my feet up
The fireplace is whispering things to me
It’s like my favorite sound
That I just found
On a windy day
Track Name: Mexico
I would love to go
Spend a day or two in Mexico
Give up the LA scene
Go and see about a Mexican dream

You’ve got to take a stand
When you’re living like a one man band
Stuck in the things you know
When you could be down in Mexico

Will be the greatest thing
To be easy for the whole of spring
Never a role to play
Never worried bout the time of day

Leaving the past behind
You won’t need it at the border line
We got the clothes we’re in
Gonna make em last the whole weekend

No more rhyming
No good timing

You know that useless pride?
It won’t be needed in the countryside
Making a brand new plan
Where I can sleep beneath the Yucatan

Ever wonder where the days have gone?
Wonder why the nights seem long?
Get off the losing team
Go and see about a Mexican dream
Track Name: Cross Your Heart
I’m working on this tailspin
And coming out a changed man
In daylight

We’re dressing up this mannequin
With broken glass and sharp pins
Til she feels
And we can’t feel at all

Cross your heart
Its full of lies that’ll get you through the night
But they’re not lasting in daylight

Balloons are floating overhead
With each its own reality
A nice dream where you can have it all

You pull one down and wish us well
But all you mean is go to hell
And that’s how you get lost
And stick us with the cost

[chorus]